The self-proclaimed ‘spokesperson of God’, aged 51, rose to fame as a guerrilla leader who started a civil war in the 80’s in his homeland of Uganda and wishes to set up a government based on the ten commandments and African mysticism.
A spokesperson for the ITV show told us,“He had huge media coverage earlier in the year and after a brief time fell rapidly into obscurity. We thought he would be perfect to join our other D-list celebs in Australia.”
“He already spends most of his time hiding out in the Congo rainforest, so spending time in a jungle will be no problem to him.” Says David Umbolo, Head of PR for the Lord’s Resistance Army, which Kony is the leader. “The only thing he might be afraid of is Linda Robson.”
Many people are outraged at the idea of this Ugandan warlord entering the jungle-based pseudo-reality programme. Hundreds of letters have been written to ITV and Ofcom. Joanne Darling, 42 is a full time mum and couch potato. “I’m a big fan of the show and watch every year…. I think it’s a disgrace that Kony is being made part of the show… It’s an outrage… He already has extensive jungle experience and this is unfair to all the other celebrities.”
Has Kony as chance of being crown King of the Jungle? Well maybe, according to Ugandan President Yoweri Museveni , “We may have our differences, because he wants me dead, but Kony is a dedicated family man.” Kony is reported to have up to 88 wives and nearly 200 children. “He does a lot of work for the children, turning them into soldiers and sex-slaves.”