Conclave Fined For Breaching Carbon Tax Laws

Conclave

High ranking members of the world’s largest cult were fined today by the Italian Government, who in turn were instructed to do so by the European Union, after severe breaches of carbon emission laws. The fine was a result of the group spewing smoke and fumes across the skyline of an already polluted Rome.

Although the Vatican is technically an independent state, they agreed to national and international sanctions regarding carbon emissions and are therefore liable to be fined.

The Vatican, had previously committed to using smokeless coal in conclave proceedings, but the sight of dark, thick, black smoke – during the churches ‘men only’ meeting – had indicated that they had not followed through on their commitment. No real surprise there though.

The Vatican will hope to deal with this as soon as possible, as it comes during one of the churches most difficult periods. Recently it was discovered that horsemeat was found in the Lamb Of God.

International pressure is now mounting on the conclave to elect a new Pope, before the sum total of their black smoke single handedly destroys the entire planet, or worse, gives Al Gore another reason to make another movie.

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(Additional Content Therese Ryan)

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