Reports of Eurovision Fever Affecting Many

eurovision 2013 ireland

It’s that time of year again when doctors and health professionals see an increase in the amount of people suffering from Eurovision fever.  

GPs and health centres nationwide have reported an increase in the number of people that they are treating for the dangerous fever.

With the semi-finals kicking off and the grand final on this weekend, plans have already been made to increase staffing levels and medical supplies, but doctors are warning people about the symptoms associated with the illness.

Symptoms

The Eurovision fever manifests itself through various different physical symptoms. Those effected can have their aural perceptions damaged, where they perceive music that is shite, as being bearable, or even good.

Around this time, people can experience dangerous mood swings. Victims can go from extreme levels of excitement to becoming overly aggressive, especially if interrupted during the viewing of the event.

Eurovision fever can alter behaviour too and cause many to consume large amounts of alcohol at twisted Eurovision parties, which authorities believe are elaborate covers for dirty underground sex raves.

Eurovision fever may also be linked to an increase in republicanism amongst some Irish victims.

Historical records show that the fever affects Irish people more so than other nationalities and it’s suggested by some that it may have a genetic component to it, making it extremely hard for Irish people to not be affected by the crippling symptoms.

People are being advised to take care over the coming days, as the spread of the fever reaches it’s pinnacle. Avoiding RTE, mass and old ladies is also strongly suggested as this will help lower your chances of being exposed to the seasonal fever.

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