29 year old Simon Campbell has today revealed that he wishes he was unemployed so that he could actually get a chance to enjoy the freak heat wave, instead of having to spend his days locked in his city centre office.
Simon works in the financial sector where it has become standard practise to work extremely long hours. He is in before 8am and usually doesn’t get home for until after 9.
Making the time in work harder are the pictures of his unemployed friends enjoying their days in the sun being constantly uploaded to Facebook. His out of work pals have set up an ironic “Job Club” and spend their days hitting the beach, pitch and putting and taking leisurely strolls through numerous public parks around the country.
Today, Simon saw that they were planning a day trip to Dun Laoghaire to creep on girls and get a Teddy’s 99. Simon hasn’t been able to creep on girls during the day in years and worryingly has never even had a Teddy’s.
He is desperately hoping to get sacked today, so that he can spend some quality time with the lads for once and not just be working on his massive NAV. He’d ask for annual leave, but his manager is a dick.
Simon will probably spend the rest of the day imaging having the heated argument he’s always wanted to have with his boss and then walking out, but will suppress that deeply inside his mind again and continue to work away quietly.