A 30 year old football fan has just been appointed the new Ireland manager after the FAI spotted a series of football related status updates he had posted on his Facebook timeline.
The news puts an end to weeks of speculation about who would wind up filling Giovanni Trapattoni’s boots.
The FAI has given the job to 30 year Jason Ward, from Blanchardstown, Dublin.
Ward is a die-hard Manchester United fan and spends his Saturdays shouting at a television screen in his local pub, so that other’s know that he’s a better supporter than they are.
This passion, couple with his years of experience posting grammatically incorrect football related status updates, secured the man the top job in Irish football.
Ward has experience shite talking about domestic and international matches and has a strong track record of posting horsesh*t comments online about European matches too.
The contract is reportedly an 18 month one and Ward has been offered it through the government’s JobBridge scheme, where he’ll receive an extra €50 per week in his social welfare payments.
Ward will also now have to end his position at Corduff Football Club, where he was working closely with their Under 8 D team.
However, some of the parents of the team are delighted that Jason is leaving the club. Many claim that his aggressive shouting from the sidelines towards the 7 and 8 year olds, was actually bordering on a form of emotional abuse towards the children.
Fans are advised to continue to post terribly written, often confusing, football related status updates and where possible, avoid using any punctuation whatsoever, as doing so will more than likely ensure they get scouted by a top club and offered a contract.