Numerous, self centred, narcissistic people all over Ireland have declared that the next full planetary rotation around the sun will somehow be dedicated entirely to them.
Facebook and Twitter have been flooded with the ever annoying declaration that the the next year will belong to a select few people and that someone, the rest of us are meant to piss off and leave until they have returned on an empty planet, fully fulfilled in their life’s goals and ambitions.
The majority of people claiming 2014 as theirs turn out to be white, middle to upper class morons, who for some reason feel as if they deserve the entire year for themselves over everyone else.
They are going to have 2014 ahead of the everyone, including those trapped in war torn, desolate third world countries, who are sick and dying and struggle to find food on a daily basis. They can fuck off because unfortunately, 2014 won’t be their year.
It’s not sure how many people at any one time can claim an entire year over everyone else, but reports this year are emerging showing that an ever increasing number of people are trying to claim the next calendar year as their own.
People are being warned of the increase in these types of head melting updates on numerous social media channels, but are being asked that if you have not personally booked 2014 in for yourself, to kindly leave the planet for a year so that those that have, can be left with the most important people in their lives – themselves.
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