Irish Rail have announced that they will be handing out free lubricant for commuters all this week, to try help them cope with the f*cking they will be receiving with the new increases in travel fares.
Irish Rail increased their fares today which saw some people being hit with a 30% hike in the amount they are paying for the travel.
Or if travelling from Sligo Irish Rail are hoping that you’ll take the initiative and f*ck yourself.
The samples of lubricant will be available at all Dublin train stations this week. Newly hired promotional staff will also be on hand in Connolly, Heuston and Pearse Street Stations to help get the lotion to commuters.
The new staff have been recruited via the JobBridge scheme and won’t be kept on after the campaign has finished.
It is hoped that the lubricant will ease the pain caused by the hike in fares, that is now seeing people having to choose between eating, walking to work or getting f*cked on the train.
The decision to increase the fares comes after the majority of people have been hit with salary reductions, increases in taxes and rises in their cost of living.
The National Transport Authority are hoping that by reducing people’s disposable income even more during the Christmas period, they can damage the overall demand and slow down any hopes of an economic revival.
Image: Shane Gillen