Even though Thailand is a 2008 thing to do, it still is great.
So, if you’re almost 10 years behind everyone and still want to go, I’ve some amazing tips.
Here’s why Thailand is great and here’s what you should do.
So, one thing to get right is the culture difference.
Toilets in Thailand are different. They are just holes on the ground. You have to squat down on them and then do your pees and poos.
It can be hard to balance. I’m used to squatting down after taking my pants off, just not when I’ve to do that. Ew.
So be careful. I peed on my ankle once while doing it.
Another time, when I was having sex with an Asian man there, I squatted down on top of him. I had taken so much XTC and speed that I kinda forgot whether I was doing a wee or having sex.
I peed on him by mistake. He really liked it though which was good. I wonder what he liked so much about it? I might try it sometime. I always post inspirational pictures online about trying new things, so maybe I’ll do it this weekend.
Thailand has loads of beaches. It’s a perfect place to use your bucket and spade. I made a really big sandcastle.
I took a picture of it and sent it to my mam. She said she’ll print it out and stick it on the fridge! Thailand is so great!
Get Away With The Girls
Thailand is such a fun holiday with the girls. 5 of us went the last time. It was so much fun.
I am grateful.
Even though we all really hate each other, we still went. We take great pictures together and the magazines use them, so we get in the papers.
I suppose I don’t hate all of them. I have one best friend Polly. We are so good to each other.
One time I let her stay in my house because hers was getting repossessed. I think that’s when a priest comes out to get rid of a ghost that’s living there.
She is so great to me. And she’s a bit fat and not that pretty so I get all the attention. It’s really great being her friend, because on nights out, guys will talk to her first because they aren’t scared of her looks. Because she doesn’t really have any.
Sometimes she gets sad on nights out and cries on her own. I never know why because I’m usually scoring the really hot guy she likes. Deep down I think she is happy at least one of us gets to have them though, right? She gets over it in the end.
If she lost more weight she might be hotter. She is always training and on diets. She should use my gym guide and just get good genetics. I got them for free, so she can totally get them somewhere. Maybe on ASOS.
It’s great, I don’t have to compete with her in anything, which is exactly what you need in a best friend, especially working in the modelling industry! She doesn’t mind getting cropped out of photos either, which is good.
Celebrity Big Brother
This has nothing to do with Thailand, I’m just saying it so you know I could have been on Celebrity Big Brother. I filled out a form online and received an automatic email back.
I came so close. Jeremy fingered me at a teenage disco before. So that’s cool!
Go To The Islands
The Islands are brilliant. Much better than Bangkok. Which is a shitehole. Like there were people who wouldn’t even go home at night. They just slept on a bench with a big bag. Why would anyone do that?
They are so scummy, and hadn’t showered in like, ages.
Do they not realise people have to look at them? Just have a shower and sleep at home. It’s not that hard!
Some parts were really bad. It was like a sweaty Ilac Centre.
I’d give Thailand a 5 out of 10 because I can’t count any higher.
My new boobs are booked in for Monday! I can’t wait, so much happened and I nearly didn’t get them.
But I’ll tell you more about them later. I have to get ready for hanging up coats and stamping hands in Krystle!
Have a fab weekend!