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Official: Napping To Become Olympic Sport By 2024
The International Olympic Committee (IOC) has today confirmed that napping will become an official sport at the 2024 games. Huge amounts of people all over the world – the western…
Unfit Man Taking Up More Of A ‘Central Play Maker Role’ At Astro
Gary Lawlor, a 31 year old man who has been progressively getting fatter and unfitter, has decided to become more of a central play maker at his weekly game of…
Concerns Growing For Man Who Joined Dangerous CrossFit Cult
Families of a 28 year old man from Malahide, Dublin, are fearing for the worst after he is thought to have recently joined a dangerous CrossFit cult. The cult of CrossFit…
Uncovered: Financial Corruption at Sepp Blatters Weekly Game of Astro
As news of Sepp Blatter’s 8 year ban from football emerges, more damaging information is coming out regarding serious financial irregularities at his weekly game of astro with the lads. …
Jose Mourinho Sacked – Likely To Be Replaced By Fantasy Football Manager
In breaking news this afternoon, it appears that Chelsea have sacked manager Jose Mourinho as first team manager. The reigning league champions have suffered a string of defeats with the…
Many Begrudging Irish Devastated After McGregor Win
Thousands of begrudging Irish people have been left devastated, after Conor McGregor once again backed up his talk with a 13 second knock out of Jose Aldo at UFC194. Waking this…
WIN: 2 VIP Tickets For The McGregor Bandwagon
To help celebrate UFC194 and the ever increasing amount of MMA experts coming out of the woodwork, we’ve got an amazing prize to giveaway. Aldo takes on McGregor this Saturday…
Liverpool Supporters To Aid Manchester United Fans In Crisis
In an attempt to help Manchester United Fans deal with the implosion of their once great team, an unlikely foe has extended a helping hand. Manchester United fans are currently…
Brazil Blame Controller Settings For Germany Defeat
Brazil have issued a statement outlining that it was unfamiliar controller settings that was the main reason behind last night’s humiliating 7-1 defeat to Germany. By Cormac Moore Brazil manager Luiz…
Giggs Brings Keating, Woods and Hefner Onto Backroom Team
Ryan Giggs has drafted in Ronan Keating, Tiger Woods and Hugh Hefner to join his backroom team after being appointed interim manager for the fallen giants Manchester United. By Cormac…
UN Finds GAA Guilty Of Human Rights Violations
A damning report published today by the United Nations, has found the Gaelic Athletics Association (GAA) guilty of breaching numerous international human rights and has called the organisation “shameful in…
Brian O’Driscoll To Open Sheep Farm In Dublin
The Freedom of the City of Dublin has been awarded to legendary rugby star Brian O’Driscoll at a reception in the Mansion House. Sources close to the now ex-international player…
Gooch Undergoes Cruciate Surgery; Runs Marathon, Rescues Orphans
Having undergone surgery on a cruciate ligament injury sustained during a match for his club Dr. Croakes, Crocked Kerry GAA Superstar Colm “Gooch” Cooper has begun his road to recuperation…
GAA To Reduce Number of Replays Thanks To Garth Brooks
The GAA have announced plans for a reduction in the number of drawn matches in this year’s All-Ireland Senior Championship in the wake of yet another sold out Garth Brooks…
Sochi 2014: Olympic Torch Snuffed Out For Being Flaming
Welcome to the first day of coverage of the 22nd Winter Olympic Games. The Potato will be here to give you all the stories from Sochi 2014. Olympic Torch The…
RTE Pay €85K to Non-Homophobe John Waters for Olympic Commentary
It has now finally been revealed, by The Potato, why RTE paid six people a combined sum of €85,000. It has nothing to do with the ‘Panti’ controversy, as many…
Meet Ireland’s First Ever Olympic Bobsleigh Team
Ireland has a long and proud sporting history and has never let the small size of the island prevent it from competing at the highest of levels in a variety of sports. …
Moyes Encourages Players to Cheat on Wives in Bid to Regain Form
Beleaguered Manchester United manager boss David Moyes is hoping a new strategy will help improve his sides frankly horrific recent form. Writes Gerry McBride. The controversial plan is to have…
Dublin Spire To Be Re-Named The “Stephen Cluxton Point”
Following yesterdays outrage that the monument known as The Spire of Dublin might be re-named after deceased South African president Nelson Mandela, the people of our Fair City launched a…
Shock: Footballer Survives Tackle During Match
The world of soccer was left dumbfounded yesterday after a Spanish striker miraculously walked away from a tackle, writes Gerry McBride. The incident, which occurred during a match between La…
Man Who Joined Gym Last Week Now An Expert On Everything
Only a week into his New Years Resolution to get fit and lose some weight, boisterous tub o’ guts Floyd Sackett has announced he has become a God damn expert…
Local GAA Lad Cooks Dinner Using Fire In His Belly
A local GAA lad, from Navan O’Mahony’s, county Meath, cooked last night’s dinner for himself using nothing more than the fire in is belly. By Cormac Moore Podge McShinty’s gas…
David Moyes Has Been Sacked As Manchester United Boss
Manchester United have confirmed today that David Moyes has been let go as manager of the club and will be replaced immediately. United lost their 3rd match in a row…
Paddy Power Paying Out On Man Utd Being Relegated
Irish bookmakers Paddy Power have today started paying out to punters who have backed the struggling Manchester Untied to be relegated from the Premiership this season. By Cormac Moore The…
Tears For Ronan O’Gara Cause Devastating Floods Nationwide
MET Eireann have confirmed today that the devastating flooding seen around the country has in fact been caused by the collective tears of a nation, that weeped quietly to themselves…
New Psychologically Tormenting Fitness Challenge Hits Ireland
Following the success of such events as Tough Mudder and Hell and Back, a new All-Terrain fitness challenege, aimed at tormenting people psychologically as well as physically, calling itself Hardy…
Hungover Woman Puts Off New Year’s Health Plans Until Tomorrow
A 30 year old woman, Rebecca Quinn, from Portmarknock, North Dublin, who claimed recently that 2014 would be her year, has decided to put off making any positive life changes,…
Support Groups To Be Set Up For Irish Rugby Fans
The IRFU have announced this evening that they will fund the roll out of national support centres for fans, after the crushing defeat to New Zealand. Panels of expert counsellors…
Devastated Student Removes New Zealand From Travel Plans
24 year old student Darren O’Reilly has today decided to completely remove New Zealand from his list of countries he wants to visit next summer. The decision was made while…
POLL: Should The Irish Rugby Team Go Out On The Piss Tonight?
The Irish rugby team are this evening going out on an all night bender in preparation for their test match tomorrow against the All Blacks. The Irish team is hoping…
Listen | Eircom Launch Their New Ad For Weight Loss Product
In a recent post, we revealed how telecoms giant Eircom have launched a brand new and exciting weight loss product. Eircom’s new broadband service has been designed to constantly drop…
Irish Rugby Team Planning Piss Up Ahead of New Zealand Test
Joe Schmidt has today confirmed that the Irish rugby team will be forced to go out on a serious bender ahead of Sunday’s test match against New Zealand. The Irish…
Student Blames Controller Settings For Losing At FIFA 14
23 year old Brian Caffrey has blamed “unfamiliar controller settings” for losing every single game of FIFA 14 over the weekend. Brian was playing against his friends and lost every…
College GAA Player Has Been Wearing Same Team Hoodie For 3 Years
A DIT Senior GAA player has been wearing the exact same team hoodie for the last 3 years, a special report by The Potato can reveal. Sean O’Neill purchased the…
GAA To Launch ‘Next Score Wins’ Championship In 2014
The GAA are to introduce a new format for next year’s GAA Championship in a bid to make the game more open and competitive. Officials today announced that the All…
Marathon Runner Finds Jesus Christ After Nipple Stigmata
Dublin City Marathon runner Andrew Byrnes has today proclaimed his devotion to the word of Jesus Christ, after experiencing severe stigmata during today’s race. Stigmata is a term used by…
Peaumount United’s Stephanie Roche Added To FIFA 14
Developers at EA Sports have just announced that Peamount United’s Stephanie Roche will be added to FIFA 14, when they release the game’s next software update. Roche’s scored one of…
Man Gets Ireland Job Based On His Football Related Status Updates
A 30 year old football fan has just been appointed the new Ireland manager after the FAI spotted a series of football related status updates he had posted on his…
Miley Cyrus and Sinead O’Connor Agree UFC Showdown
UFC organisers have bagged one of their highest profile matches ever, by securing both Miley Cyrus and Sinead O’Connor for a meeting in the Octagon later this month. Cyrus and…
POLL: Do You Have Any Idea What John 3:7 Means?
Every single game that’s held in Croke Park, features one man and his sign, John 3:7. And All Ireland Final day is no different. Perched up in Hill 16, this…
Coppers Woman Fooled By All Ireland Ticket Receipts
A blonde woman in her late twenties, was last night fooled into shifting some lad from Mayo, when he presented her with 2 ticket receipts and claimed they were in…
POLL: Will You Be Learning Players Names Ahead Of The GAA Final?
With the GAA final taking place tomorrow, numerous people in both Dublin and Mayo will surely be jumping upon an already packed bandwagen, hoping to share in the potential success…
Exposed: What You Need to Know About The All Ireland Final
While the rest of the country is scrambling to cover their houses in bunting and paint their children in team colours ahead of tomorrows clan clash, we at The Potato…
3 Mayo Men Declared Dead In Attempt To Secure Sam Maguire
Enda Kenny TD took a historical step today by legally declaring three Irish citizens dead who are in fact still very much alive. The men, the last surviving members of…
Skrillex Suing The “Step” Out Of The “Dubs”
Dublin GAA faces its first major challenge today ahead of their All-Ireland Clash against Mayo- and it isn’t football related. American electronic music artist Skrillex is suing the Dublin GAA…
Louis Walsh Revealed As New Ireland Manager
In a shocking move this afternoon, the FAI have revealed that Louis Walsh will be taking over as manager of the Irish senior football team. The news comes after Giovanni…
Trapattoni Linked To Managerial Position At Macari’s Blanchardstown
It appears that Macari’s Takeaway have offered Giovanni Trapattoni the managerial position at it’s Blanchardstown village location. The chain of chippers decided to make the offer after Ireland’s defeat to…
SHOCKING: Sharp Increase in Cases of Gaelic’s Disease
A condition known as Gaelic’s Disease is taking hold of populations in Cork, Clare, Mayo and Dublin. Usually dormant throughout most of the year, Gaelic’s Disease reaches a threatening intensity…
Transfer News: Paul McShane Signs For Harchester United
As transfer deadline day draws ever closer it can now be confirmed that Irish international Paul McShane has signed for fictional premier league side Harchester Untied. The deal, finalised in…
Roy Keane Writes Open Letter To Alex Ferguson
Roy Keane has penned an open later to Alex Ferguson after the ex united boss publicly slammed Keane in his autobiography. Ferguson in his books makes comments about an interview Roy Keane… Read more »